Quantum Leaps

My life path is programed to perform quantum leaps.  We all change all the time.

Physically, I have changed so much these past ten years.  My old colleagues did not recognize me at all. People who just meet me think that I'm much, much younger than my actual age although I had looked my age all my life until two years ago.  Except for taking better care of my skin from the sun exposure and getting my skin moles removed, I benefit from some weight loss as a result of eating healthier and a sculptured body from proper exercises.  As if it were some kind of a shape shifter that made by someone who snapped fingers directly at me.

My life experience is beyond my control.  Karma is at play half of the time.  If I have relevant education and professional experience for a job I apply for, it's likely that I'll make the cut for an interview.  If I do well in the interview, I'll advance to be short listed.  I reap what I sow, exactly.  Otherwise, I cannot even steer my life boat to directions I want no matter how hard I try.  In fact, how life happens baffles me.

During my first few years in the U.S., I lived with my mother and her new husband.  I learned English and trivial knowledge by watching TV show Jeopardy with my stepfather and marveled at how many correct answers he got.  Many of successful contestants are teachers, writers, and diplomats, who call themselves Foreign Service Officers.  I was very impressed by these FSOs and wishing that I were smart like them.  Being a diplomat was a far fetched dream for someone who didn't speak English well and knew little about those subjects in the foreign service tests.  I couldn't even write a coherent paragraph.  Let alone an essay to makes sense and express my thought clearly.

They say to be careful with what you wish for.  I'm never going to be smart.  I know that.  Nonetheless, the other wish came true one day.  I ended up working in a diplomatic capacity by being in the right place and the right time.  It didn't last long.  It was a miracle that all of these were taking place and how I got in and out.

I wonder if I had rubbed that magic lamp and asked the Genie to grant me a wish, and it did.  If any of these is a replay of "nothing lasts forever," I get it now.

The Genie also bestowed me with credible prosperity.  My various careers did not make me rich.  I was never made the head of any organization.  Except for entry-level jobs during my first five years in the United States, I advanced to a middle-level position at most as I didn't have enough time and experience to rise to top management in each career.  But later each career came with perks and gave me a brush with wealth.  Unexpectedly.

I was put in first class and business class flights flying across the ocean.  One time I had to ask a flight attendant how to eat caviar.  After putting a dab of caviar on a cracker and adding to it a splash of lemon juice, she also gave me a glass champagne while we were more than 30,000 feet above the ground.  On another flight I was given a massage in the business class.  In two other flights, I sat next to someone who was prominent in his field in his home country each time.  In many, many occasions, I met with people that enriched my life and expanded my knowledge of the physical and spiritual worlds.

With a stroke of luck, I usually live in a nice neighborhood.  Our house is usually one of the poorest.

Spiritually, I have gone from an impatient, hot tempered woman to someone who is not bothered by anything.  Realization that a soul has to go through all experiences of pain and suffering as well as joy and happiness is liberating.

Illusions are a test to remind me that none is real.  Drastic changes can be both frightening and welcoming.  Forceful transformations leave me in awe at the power of Divine Being.

As much as I'm grateful at the depth and richness of my life experience, I give up trying to understand how my life make quantum leaps.  Perhaps because how I look (to be) and what I possess (to have) is impermanence.

And I have all the proofs that are etched in my soul.